Every romantic relationship is generally full with dream and hope. No matter how long it sustained whether the other one was dedicated in it or not when a break up happen we feel heartbroken. It is not uncommon to be unable to retrieve from it even after a year.So here is 7 ways to go through breakups that will reduce your struggle and save you time to move on.
Beside the missing part breakup brings lot of helpless feelings. A survey on 5,705 people in nearly 100 countries about their breakups and grief afterwards revealed some interesting facts
Though women generally initiate a break up they also suffer more severely than men. Most dominant pain of suffering are-anxity, depression, insomnia or lack of sleep, weight change etc. Especially those who are dumped take a long time to self discover and gain trust in a relationship.
Accept the reality and grieve out
Sheri Meyers a marriage therapist told in Huffington post –the first thing in breakup has to be the anticipation of the part of the process when one feel-terrified about the future, one sense the abandonment feeling. She says it is important to acknowledge the pain and loss to be able to be-Me from Us.
- Write-A very easy way to let your feeling out is-Writing it down.
It is a healthy way to vent on some one. As long as we do not let it out we keep dreaming or talking or thinking about it in the mind.
- Keep it clean-Clean up your room and office space as much as possible of the things that remind you of him/her.
This will help you, not to intensify the pain anymore in every occasion they are suppose to trigger you of a memory.
- Give away-There was a time people suggested go shop as a part of breakup recovery process.
However surveys say you feel better about yourself when you give away or donate something. So as a grieving process you can try this new mechanism.
- Cry or talk-Despite the limited evidence that ‘Crying help you feel better’ by researchers, it is still an effective mechanism to cope with grief for many people. Specially for those who used to receive attention in childhood after a cry.
who feel better after a cry or after talking to a therapist or trusted one about your pain than you should not resist it. Give it a try.
Have a concept of who you are what you need
A study in 2012 found that people with “poor self-concept” had a harder time moving forward after a breakup. Those who know what are their expectation, limitation, self worth to a good extent have a better mechanism to deal with the loss.
They have strong sense of what they are and what they deserve. Somehow these self conscious people usually have a better reflex.
Researcher also found that those who reflected upon their relationship usually get over it quickly.So when you are feeling quite at a loss after a failed relationship, do not lose your feeling of self worth, which is very common in most cases.
Stop blaming yourself or stop finding whose fault lead to this, day after day .Concentrate on what makes you happy and try to go for it.
- Be thankful for the good things
This technique is quite magical. When only disrespect, loss, pain, failure and negative feelings are fueling up in your mind if you try exercising thankfulness it will offer you some comfort. However easy to say but difficult to act, it is quite difficult for anyone to look beyond the loss and immediate pain from the breakup and recognize the great things once achieved and was happy for.
Challenge is -to be able to go past the cloud of negativity and rediscover the great things one already has with gratitude. Even studies suggest gratitude let one feel more positive.
- Do things you like
At a gloomy stage of life we often neglect the power of going out with friends or having dinner outside home. The mind is always busy in grieving or thinking back and forth about the failed relationship, that it often forgets the events that used to refresh mind.
In such cases forcibly take a break from breakup pain, call a person you like to hang out with, go out with friends, family or colleague for a meal, on a road trip, to a movie theater or to the places you loved to go.
- Take care
Whether it is a fight, a troubled relationship or a break up; when mind suffers body also suffers.
Give body a boost. Do exercise regularly and do not ignore the power of a spa day. It will relax you, make you feel special and help you to rejuvenate
No matter how serious the relation was, it is never worth more than your future. In most cases break up leaves us at zero ground and everything seems difficult to build again. However break up is not worth an excuse to be depressed or indulging you in an unhealthy lifestyle, so let us embrace a healthy mechanism to cope with the change. These 7 ways to go through breakups are easy to follow and make sense when you really follow it.After all life is too short to waste for holding onto a failed relationship,isn’t it?