Conflict management

Fortunately scholarly articles on conflict management are not in scarcity over internet. Today if you are having a conflict with your colleague or spouse or anyone in of your acquaintance you can rush toward Google and find out some interesting fact about it. However too much material can make you feel lost sometimes,so I am trying to keep it simple, discuss about 5 different perspective of conflict resolution that works in different contexts.

Conflict management
A cooperative intention can resolve a conflict peacefully.

Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument shows that-In general someone’s personality type will determine his conflict management style in major aspects-

Assertiveness and cooperativeness are two important dimension in this 5 conflict management styles


  1. Accommodating

High in Cooperation, Low in Assertiveness

Such situation arise cooperation of someone goes beyond his self objective and achievements. Such situation a conflict will be resolved at one person’s favor and other person’s sacrifice.

Conflict management
When one party give in and other party give nothing its called accommodating

This may work only if those who get his demand fulfilled are an expert or know something important for both parties betterment.

If it is a trial matter for you and your objective is to maintain a good rapport with the other party than this strategy will be beneficial.

  1. Avoiding

Low in Assertiveness, Low in Cooperation

When someone choose to resolve the issue by simply ignoring the other person’s interest or problem than such scenario occur. You are being only concerned about your aim and ignoring other party’s objective.

Conflict management
Ignoring the other person can also get the result

This will not work in long-term because mutual help is required for both of your success. So if he feel neglected he may revolt in future and total function may shut down.

When it is about a situation where other party is too emotionally charged and if he needs space, time to sooth than avoiding can work just fine.

When you see chance of winning by adjusting is close to zero or if you have to pay really high price in negotiation. In such cases you can choose this style but it works only for a short time so you may need to think of an alternative before it fails.

  1. Collaborating

High in Cooperation, High in Assertiveness

A true win win situation. Both parties agree on matters that leads to there goal achievement. A scenario every conflict resolution may seek for, however this is not easy to achieve and require innovative solution.

Conflict management
The most efficient way of handing conflict-Collaborating

This may need to redefine the challenges looking for creative idea from multiple individuals. Such solution may need costly or time consuming infrastructural setup. I may need meeting with board directors or authoritative personnel as well if the matter is of that high involvement. Most importantly it works when both party really trust each other and respect each other’s objective

  1. Competing

High in Assertiveness, low in Cooperation

This is Opposite of Accommodating. This is the “win-lose” situation. Where you know what other party seeks but instead of helping you will ignore his priority, not help him, and treat him as a contender. You are threatened by other party’s success and leave no stone unturned to win. You may even do the things that will cost him because you only want your success.

Conflict management
Where you know what other party seeks but you ignore his priority, and treat him as a contender.

This works when you are aware that your intentions are right. You need a quick solution, when negotiation or becoming accommodating will cost you your own goal.

This will definitely tarnish your relation with the other party.

  1. Compromising

Medium in Assertiveness, Medium in Cooperation

This is the “lose-lose” scenario where no party reaches destination both settle for something less.

Conflict management
This is the “lose-lose” scenario where no party reaches destination both settle for something less

It is the easy way out when both could aim for collaboration. Useful if your goal is less important than your relation with the other party. If both of your goals are equally meaningful and important to both of you than this is a solution but  from such understanding collaborating is best alternative.

The kind of person you are the fight or defense mechanism you use for sustaining does have a lot to do with your conflict management style. So becoming a winner in conflict management you need to be aware of self. If your style works for you than great, if not than it is time to look for alternative.

One can try scenario based approaches; trial and error basis for different scenarios. Conflict is inevitable so if one can embrace it as an opportunity to turn it in someone’s favor or to end the conflict into a better destination than it is rather an achievement.Some more approach of conflict management is shown in the video

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